Customer Serviced?

I should have built my last computer, but I'm too lazy. I'm still kind of computer-lite.

As I'm sure you all know, my desktop PC died a couple of months ago, after 13 months of operation, but since I purchased the Geek Squad protection, I thought it was all good.

So, the first 3 times (1. Brought it in, 2. Came back from off-site not fixed, 3. Came back again not fixed) I joked with the techs, explained what I thought was wrong, and was exceedlingly patient about the whole thing, even though it had taken over a month.

So, I got robocalled Sunday, and emailed on Monday that my box was 'ready to be picked up.' I went to Best Buy, and the Geek Squad Tech (some pimply faced youngster) tried to give me my box. I asked if they had used the restore disks provided by HP (which I had given them) to test and burn-in the box. "No," he replied. "I didn't see any disks."

So, I kindly pointed out that the service order in his hand (a copy of what I had) stated that the recovery disks were with the computer.

An aside.....

I know this is a personal failing. I know that God or the pseudo-magical science of genetics has visited a small percentage of the human population with severe height challenges. But, having watched too much "Lucha Libre" when I was younger, and after enjoying circuses, carnivals and side shows, I must say....little people make me laugh. Although I tried not to, I used to watch that TLC show (Really? Learning Channel?), "Little People, Big World" or whatever it was called. Midgets, dwarfs, dwarves, hobbits, it doesn't matter what you call them, I get a little giggly when I see them, especially when they're operating in a perfectly normal customer service function. With normal length black Geek Squad Ties. I know it is wrong. Fortunately, the little person in this case was the only person behind the Geek Squad counter who didn't have his head firmly up his butt, and at least tried to help his pimply partner. So, I restrained myself. I think I may have hurt myself, but I was restrained, polite and did not take the cell-phone picture I so desparately wanted to take.

OK, digression finished.

So pimple boy starts the restore, tells me it will be done in 40 minutes and goes about his work. I, having done this before with the GS, went to Target to buy those stupid 1 cup custom coffee widgets for our coffee maker, some sink mats, a copy of Dexter Season 3 (which oddly, Best Buy didn't have) and a copy of Dan Brown's new book (starteed it last night, kind of slow, I don't think his writing has improved much, but the severed hand was a nice touch).

I return to Best Buy to see that they have ignored the prompt on my box which would continue the restore, and 'Pimples' pipes up with, "Look, it works great. The Restore is finished!" At this point, I have now lost my patience, and ask to speak with a manager. I am informed that I have to wait another 1/2 hour for the manager to get back from lunch.

OK, now I'm steaming. That fucking pimplefaced geek (Hey, he chose to work there) still hasn't pressed the mouse button to continue the restore. I wander off into the Big Screen TV area and plop down on a recliner to watch the Celtics/Cavs second half on PC ported to the big screen. Sales people are now getting annoyed at the fat, long-haired guy hanging around Best Buy like a homeless person in the Public Library, so the Manager finally scurries over to me.

I returned to the counter to discuss my problems.

Another aside.....

I'm over 50 and have 47 years of musical experience, along with about 15 of musical training. I've been performing, off and on, for almost 40 years (piano recitals, a 6th grade talent show where I sang, acapella, 'Blood, Sweat and Tears' version of Spinning Wheel, while being illuminated by...wait for it...a Christmas Spinning Wheel, remember those 4 color things?... 10 years of Choral and Chamber singing, 10 years of Rock and Roll, 5 years of Country, and another 5-10 years of lounge acts) and those years have given me the ability to project my voice without shouting. Many people have said I have a voice made for radio (although unfortunately, I also have a face made for radio). Normally, I keep it under control, but my wife has often complained that when my kids and I start discussing things, it is impossible for her to sleep, watch TV, hear police sirens, etc. Needless to say, I decided to release my control on my amplitude modulation.

OK....so I'm talking pretty loudly.

And proceeding to berate this manager at the Geek Squad counter for the 4 trips I've made, the 6 weeks without a computer, the failure of his technical slaves (I may have mentioned Indonesian Illegal Immigrants chained to a wall in a Public Storage unit in Chino, where their service center is), and that fact that all they sell is service and that it didn't appear that they provided any. All of this less than 20 feet from their computer section where erstwhile employees were attempting to convince gullible consumers to purchase HPs, Dells, Compaqs and Macs with the extra-special "Geek Squad" protection contracts.

When I got to the part about Pimples lying to me that the Restore was complete, Pimples decides to interrupt me. I explain that he certainly can interrupt me, and please, enlighten both his manager and myself about which part of my diatribe was untrue? He, very adroitly, deferred comment, so I asked him specifically, "Did you tell me it was complete?" He answered "Yes." I pointed to the monitor which still showed the PC loading files (it was now almost 2 hours into the Restore, and I've done these myself, so I knew that it had now hung-up). I asked, "Does it look, complete?" Again, he shamefacedly contradicted his own previous statement by admitting, "No!"

The manager, who by this point was either on the verge of passing out or desparately looking for something, anything on the ceiling, responded by assuring me that their failure in Customer Service personnel would be addressed, and asked me to step over to the Best Buy Customer Service desk (a different line in Best Buy). After waiting another 20 minutes in that line, the young lady there handed me a copy of my original purchase receipt, pointed out that I had paid 819.99 for the original computer and directed me to go pick out a new one.

So I did. Although it really is just the same thing I bought before, it had more RAM, Faster Clock Speed, a Terabyte Hard Drive (over the 650 GB I had before), a better graphics card and for 10 dollars less. I needed a new Ethernet cable, so I actually had to pay 5 dollars. After lugging the new box back to the Customer Service counter, the young lady informed me that the new computer had a 1 year Manufacturer Warranty (like the last one), and although their regular practice was to pro-rate the cost of a new service contract, considering all I had been through they decided to comp me the $50 dollars, and give the a new 2 year Geek Squad warranty.

Mind you, it is still the same lame HP substandard components which will probably fail in 13 months, and I'll once again have to badger the Geek Squad when it does break down, but still, I think I came out of this one ahead of the game.

Sometimes, it pays to be a prick.

Musings From Teh Mancave Vol 1. Issue 7

OK, I'm stealing this one from a friend at MLW named Cleverguy...

If you had purchased $1,000 of AIG stock one year ago, you would have $42 left.
With Lehman, you would have $6.60 left.
With Fannie or Freddie, you would have less than $5 left.

But if you had purchased $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all of the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling REFUND, you would have had $214.

Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink
heavily and recycle.

It's called the 401-Keg.....

and in this article it appears that for each pack of cigarettes I buy, I save Americans 32 cents in costs related to my health care and retirement costs. Because I'm probably going to die before 65.

Drinking and smoking don't look so bad now. Huh?

Musings from teh Mancave Vol 1. Issue 6

Home again, in the Mancave. With a working XBOX again. At least they fix it for free. And give me a free month of XBOX Live. But, then again, it makes up only for the 3 weeks I missed. Hmmmmmm.

The infamous E74 error this time.

But now I can play Madden, and Tiger Woods, and MLB2K, and Fable II, and Fable I (OK, my bride plays those), and The Last Remnant.

To paraphrase:

I'm going to end up like Steve Martin in The Jerk. "All I need is this TV and my XBOX. And this chair. And my computer. And my keyboards. And my cat (Hisssss....). OK, not my cat.

I can keep in contact with people through Facebook, but I refuse (at least at this point) to Twitter. I'm already such a twit.

Of course, the bride gets upset when I hibernate back here. Shades drawn, lava lamp glowing. At least she knows where I am!!!

Musings from teh Mancave Vol 1. Issue 5

Since my online friend, Karamafish, told me I suck, I've decided to be pro-active about it.

I am making a concerted effort not to suck. In fact, in the anal-retentive way of Dungeonmasters everywhere, I'm made a little list.....

I'm going to try to exercise 30-40 minutes a day.

I'm going to sauna and jacuzzi about the same amount of time.

I'm going to pick up the prescriptions I ordered a week ago and again attempt to quit smoking.

I'm going to try to post to my blog every day I think about it.

I'm goint to practice music every day (I started again yesterday).

I need to get the piano tuned.

I'm going to try and start a band, again.

I'm not going to fuck chickens anymore.

Damn, this appears to be a lot of work. Plus, I've got to go through all my online stuff and change my email address. What a pain in the ass.

Musings from Teh Mancave Vol. 1, Issue 4

Hello, again loyal readers (Hello? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?). Life is reverting to normal here at the Mancave. It is mostly finished, with just a few small aesthetic and even hidden things to complete (connecting the TV sound to the Surround Sound. Hooking the keyboards to the computer...and buying some new composing software. Buying a couple of those guitar mounts you see at Guitar Center so I can put the 1960s Original Single Pickup Gibson Melody Maker up on the wall...er...if any of you figure out where I live, be informed I have a shotgun for home defense.).

The apartment is almost just as complete. I still have to move a folding stair stool from the old house, so my bride can reach the top shelves. Other than that, my family and I met and went through all the old stuff last weekend. Brought some more stuff over, gave away a lot to brothers, sisters and their kids. We hope to finish clean up on the old place tomorrow (more work.....will I ever get a real weekend again?).

Had a brush with mediocrity today. As it is my Friday off (it is good to be a civil servant), I went golfing this morning, out in San Dimas. I got there right at tee time. My playing partners mentioned that there was a Rock Star in the group ahead of us. I asked "Well, a real Rock Star? Is it a guy who drinks Rock Star? Or is it just a local legend or a guy with a high opinion of himself? At the second hole, a Par 3 that followed the Par 5, the groups backed up, so I checked it out. Sure enough. Fred Dirst of Limp Bizkit.

Fred has a pretty good game. But of course, simple human jealousy eventually had me, a never-was, mocking Fred, a has-been. Fred would leave his tees, so we'd hit off them. If the shot sucked, we'd say "Fuck Fred. I hate Fred." We mused that Fred's friends would all check his score and then make sure they scored higher. Thus Fred would always win. And then they'd make Fred buy lunch. Or buy new sunglasses. Then we'd say...."Being Fred Sucks." By late in the round, we were kind of silly. A playing partner hit a bad tee shot, and mentioned to me that there was a lot to remember when you addressed the ball. I said, with an air of superiority, "Not me! I just remember WWFD. What would Fred do?" Right at that point our other partner hit a smoking iron shot that wandered near Fred's group who were leaving the green. "Fore!!" we shouted. Then, I murmured to my friend, "Rob hates Fred. Rob tried to hit Fred. Rob is not feeling the Fred." Did I say we were a bit silly by this time. Obviously.

Anyway, that was fun. And it was fun last weekend, seeing 3 brothers, 1 sister and a mess of children, nieces and nephews (Children, heh. The youngest, except for the cute little grand niece, was 26). I still haven't figured out how to get pictures from my phone to my photobucket account. Nor have I gotten out the Digital Camera (My son finally returned it) and checked to see if it worked, so no pictures of the ManCave yet.

Instead, I'll paint you a word picture, starting with the Eastern Wall.

From left to right, there is the Door to the Mancave closet (is that the Mancavecave?). That closet holds most of our hanging clothers, my dresser, my shoes, the laundry hampers, the Christmas Tree and family games.

Next to that is the center wall, which up high has my Homer Clock. It is an old style clock with hands and everything. It used to speak a Homer saying on the hour, but it appears the voice thingie is broken. My daughter gave it to me. Below that is a needlepoint, which proclaims "Beware! This home protected by an Attack Cat." The cat in question is shown in a prone position, which is the usually position of our Pepper Cat. Below the Needlepoint is my computer station. LCD Monitor, printer, 2.1 Speaker, the Sub Woofer for the Surround Sound, wireless keyboard and mouse. Software and music CDs behind the cabinet door.

Next to all that is the Mancave Bathroom Door, which I share with the Pepper Cat.

I'm sure Mecca is somewhere past that wall.

The Northern Wall (Starting where it meets the Eastern Wall, at the Closet Door) has my gear. The two PAs aren't set up, but both sets of Keys are. The 3 guitars are behind the Keys, on top of more speakers, PA heads, Gig Bags. The mic stand is folded, with panties tied to it (don't ask). Mounted on the wall above it is a framed collection of Sheriff's badges from my old haunt, Mavericks.

Also, mid-way on the wall, is a print of Thelonious Monk, as painted by Billie Dee Williams (Lando Calrissian can paint!!!). By BIL gave that to me. The first light in the room comes from a string of sound sensitive lights which are draped over the keys. I use it as a nite lite. Next to the keys is a 50s era fold-down (as opposed to roll-top) desk, which my bride and I do all family business at.

Next to that is the old dining room table from my ancestral home. Formica Top. Metal legs. I use it for gaming and modeling. Under the table is a small bookshelf for oversize books. Above it is a print of a poster showing a variety of side elevations of WWII aircraft which once hung in my late Father-In-Law's office.

As the table is in the corner, I guess we'll do the Western Wall.

Below the table on this side is my Modeling stuff, my Tool box and my two small racks of tiny plastic drawers. This wall actually has my forch door (it is a sliding glass door which leades to a wrought iron railing. No porch or balcony. A fake porch. Ergo...a forch. Or a falcony, I guess). I have vertical blinds, which stay open in the day for the sun to set on the kitty. Centered, is the main light source, a three bulb vertical lamp with CFLs (quite bright, which I can dim by turning off bulbs). Next to the Table (In front of the standing lamp) are two heavy wooden end tables from my old living room. Each has a shelf. The shelves currently hold electronic parts and computer games in boxes.

On top of the end tables (which when placed side by side make a flat surface of about 5 ft. by 3 ft) hold a moving fish lamp given to me by my Daughter-In-Law, a relief globe in a wooden frame and a small fan (so I'm not constantly using the AC. The setting sun can heat this room up!!).

The Southern Wall, the longest in the room, is my piece du' resistance!!!
3/4 of the length of the wall for the 1st two feet of elevation, and 12 ft of length, are bookshelves built by my grandfather. The shelves have on them about 15 ft. of books. 10 feet of Stamp and Coin Collections. 5 feet of random memorabilia. 5 feet of unsorted mess and 5 feet of Electronics (My 360 and telephone).

Above those shelves are 4 30" wide bookshelves, with 3 more 12" high shelves. These are chock full of Wargames, RPG games, Sports Games. One shelf is full of sheet music from the 19th and 20th century. One smaller adjustable shelf has DVDs and CDs.

In the center gap is a shelf I built for my DVD player and Cable box, upon which sits the 32" LCD HDTV, upon which my Lakers are currently losing by 9 to the Denver Nuggets.

On top of the shelves are various memorabilia. Homer figures. Some old Dodger stuff. Lakers Coffee Mugs. My ship in a bottle. A piano snowglobe. My jellybean pooping sheep!! Behind them on the walls are a Jack Daniels metal plate, the International Star Registry plaques for my Mom and Dad, and my 25 year plaque from the Local Government for which I am employed.

At the end of this shelving unit are 6 paperback bookshelves about 3 feet long. They are almost full. On top of that unit are pictures of the late Colonel (My Dad) and the late Major (my bride's Dad) on each side of my stash box (did I say that out loud?). Above that on the wall is a picture/photo of Torrey Pines during WWII, with a scripture imprinted on it. That picture hung in our house for years. My mother worked at Camp Callen, near there, as a telephone operator during WWII. She met my father there. Her wish was always to retire to that area. She now lives in a nursing home in Carlsbad, about 15 minutes from there up the I-5.

Then comes the bathroom door on the adjoining Eastern Wall.

Oh yeah, there is a desk chair which is fits under the table, for using at the desk. And my rotating recliner in the center, where I can sit and be Lord of all I survey. An ottoman holds all my XBOX games and controllers.

Voila. A Mancave.

Hopefully, I'll figure out the pictures soon. Much easier!

Musings from Teh Mancave Vol. 1 Isuue 3

So, now we are both sick. Could it be the central air, maybe. Could it be (at least in my case) the going to work and continuing to move on weekends and afternoons? Maybe. Could it be the fact that it has been raining for 3 days here in L.A? Probably.

At any rate, we are both sick, and less than motivated to do anything more than clean house and do the laundry. I have a whole car load of boxes ready at the old place for movement to here. It would only take about 2 hours. I'm still trying to talk myself into doing it. Of course, I have to go to my daughter's apartment this afternoon to wait for termite inspectors. She's out of town with her Laaaahver.

Why doens't anyone play Dungeons and Dragons anymore? I have thousands of dollars of this stuff. I love playing and even Gamemaster the game. It was a popular thing back in previous economic downturns? But nobody wants to play.

Probably because of teh Intertubes and video game consoles.

Ah well, enough of my moping. I wonder which side will win. Motivation or sitting in teh (not yet completed) Mancave and playing Madden 09.

We shall see.

Net Quizzes

My buddy Julie, at Causes Rats in Laboratory Cancer, has through her example, goaded me into taking another Net Quiz.

And lo and behold...

From this time forward, you'll hold the title:
Nerd King
Carry it proudly!


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Quick Fun Facts:
375488 unique people have taken this test.

Based on these unique user's answers...

29.8% of test takers are gals,
68.4% are guys,
...the rest (1.8%) are confused.

15.5% of test takers get aroused by "iPhone," while
36.9% get utterly ill.

32.2% of all test takers would choose the Internet over sex, and
26.6% of married test takers prefer the Internet over sex.

Only 4.5% of test takers own a Jar Jar Binks t-shirt, though
49.7% of them don't own a lightsaber (priorities == messed up).




I am so proud.