Customer Serviced?

I should have built my last computer, but I'm too lazy. I'm still kind of computer-lite.

As I'm sure you all know, my desktop PC died a couple of months ago, after 13 months of operation, but since I purchased the Geek Squad protection, I thought it was all good.

So, the first 3 times (1. Brought it in, 2. Came back from off-site not fixed, 3. Came back again not fixed) I joked with the techs, explained what I thought was wrong, and was exceedlingly patient about the whole thing, even though it had taken over a month.

So, I got robocalled Sunday, and emailed on Monday that my box was 'ready to be picked up.' I went to Best Buy, and the Geek Squad Tech (some pimply faced youngster) tried to give me my box. I asked if they had used the restore disks provided by HP (which I had given them) to test and burn-in the box. "No," he replied. "I didn't see any disks."

So, I kindly pointed out that the service order in his hand (a copy of what I had) stated that the recovery disks were with the computer.

An aside.....

I know this is a personal failing. I know that God or the pseudo-magical science of genetics has visited a small percentage of the human population with severe height challenges. But, having watched too much "Lucha Libre" when I was younger, and after enjoying circuses, carnivals and side shows, I must say....little people make me laugh. Although I tried not to, I used to watch that TLC show (Really? Learning Channel?), "Little People, Big World" or whatever it was called. Midgets, dwarfs, dwarves, hobbits, it doesn't matter what you call them, I get a little giggly when I see them, especially when they're operating in a perfectly normal customer service function. With normal length black Geek Squad Ties. I know it is wrong. Fortunately, the little person in this case was the only person behind the Geek Squad counter who didn't have his head firmly up his butt, and at least tried to help his pimply partner. So, I restrained myself. I think I may have hurt myself, but I was restrained, polite and did not take the cell-phone picture I so desparately wanted to take.

OK, digression finished.

So pimple boy starts the restore, tells me it will be done in 40 minutes and goes about his work. I, having done this before with the GS, went to Target to buy those stupid 1 cup custom coffee widgets for our coffee maker, some sink mats, a copy of Dexter Season 3 (which oddly, Best Buy didn't have) and a copy of Dan Brown's new book (starteed it last night, kind of slow, I don't think his writing has improved much, but the severed hand was a nice touch).

I return to Best Buy to see that they have ignored the prompt on my box which would continue the restore, and 'Pimples' pipes up with, "Look, it works great. The Restore is finished!" At this point, I have now lost my patience, and ask to speak with a manager. I am informed that I have to wait another 1/2 hour for the manager to get back from lunch.

OK, now I'm steaming. That fucking pimplefaced geek (Hey, he chose to work there) still hasn't pressed the mouse button to continue the restore. I wander off into the Big Screen TV area and plop down on a recliner to watch the Celtics/Cavs second half on PC ported to the big screen. Sales people are now getting annoyed at the fat, long-haired guy hanging around Best Buy like a homeless person in the Public Library, so the Manager finally scurries over to me.

I returned to the counter to discuss my problems.

Another aside.....

I'm over 50 and have 47 years of musical experience, along with about 15 of musical training. I've been performing, off and on, for almost 40 years (piano recitals, a 6th grade talent show where I sang, acapella, 'Blood, Sweat and Tears' version of Spinning Wheel, while being illuminated by...wait for it...a Christmas Spinning Wheel, remember those 4 color things?... 10 years of Choral and Chamber singing, 10 years of Rock and Roll, 5 years of Country, and another 5-10 years of lounge acts) and those years have given me the ability to project my voice without shouting. Many people have said I have a voice made for radio (although unfortunately, I also have a face made for radio). Normally, I keep it under control, but my wife has often complained that when my kids and I start discussing things, it is impossible for her to sleep, watch TV, hear police sirens, etc. Needless to say, I decided to release my control on my amplitude modulation.

OK....so I'm talking pretty loudly.

And proceeding to berate this manager at the Geek Squad counter for the 4 trips I've made, the 6 weeks without a computer, the failure of his technical slaves (I may have mentioned Indonesian Illegal Immigrants chained to a wall in a Public Storage unit in Chino, where their service center is), and that fact that all they sell is service and that it didn't appear that they provided any. All of this less than 20 feet from their computer section where erstwhile employees were attempting to convince gullible consumers to purchase HPs, Dells, Compaqs and Macs with the extra-special "Geek Squad" protection contracts.

When I got to the part about Pimples lying to me that the Restore was complete, Pimples decides to interrupt me. I explain that he certainly can interrupt me, and please, enlighten both his manager and myself about which part of my diatribe was untrue? He, very adroitly, deferred comment, so I asked him specifically, "Did you tell me it was complete?" He answered "Yes." I pointed to the monitor which still showed the PC loading files (it was now almost 2 hours into the Restore, and I've done these myself, so I knew that it had now hung-up). I asked, "Does it look, complete?" Again, he shamefacedly contradicted his own previous statement by admitting, "No!"

The manager, who by this point was either on the verge of passing out or desparately looking for something, anything on the ceiling, responded by assuring me that their failure in Customer Service personnel would be addressed, and asked me to step over to the Best Buy Customer Service desk (a different line in Best Buy). After waiting another 20 minutes in that line, the young lady there handed me a copy of my original purchase receipt, pointed out that I had paid 819.99 for the original computer and directed me to go pick out a new one.

So I did. Although it really is just the same thing I bought before, it had more RAM, Faster Clock Speed, a Terabyte Hard Drive (over the 650 GB I had before), a better graphics card and for 10 dollars less. I needed a new Ethernet cable, so I actually had to pay 5 dollars. After lugging the new box back to the Customer Service counter, the young lady informed me that the new computer had a 1 year Manufacturer Warranty (like the last one), and although their regular practice was to pro-rate the cost of a new service contract, considering all I had been through they decided to comp me the $50 dollars, and give the a new 2 year Geek Squad warranty.

Mind you, it is still the same lame HP substandard components which will probably fail in 13 months, and I'll once again have to badger the Geek Squad when it does break down, but still, I think I came out of this one ahead of the game.

Sometimes, it pays to be a prick.